Ms.Matchsticks and the philosophy of bossypants

"Bossy women! That's always a scary thing to have around"- Irene screamed from the other room at work. Irene was Ms.Matchstick's co-writer at the writing firm she was an editor at.

That made Ms.Matchsticks start thinking about her new project. 'The Rise of Ms.Pants'. Is it that wrong that Ms.Matchstick as a woman should not explore the opportunities as a man should? IS it that bad that sometimes, just sometimes, women too like it just the way they want it?

Ms.Matchstick Reads


These have always been questions she used to ask herself. Why is she the bitch every time she says 'No', I will not be your doormat? Is it because they think her brain is smaller than theirs?

She and Irene spent the rest of the day talking about all those penis holders who thought they were just too much for them to deal with. Isn't it funny that every time someone loses their footing to deal with someone larger than their lives, automatically confirms to the horrible maxim applied to women everywhere: ' She's either too much or too little'.

Sad.

But, Viagra is un-taxed while, tampons aren't. because, after all penis holders bleed for seven days and they need Viagra to help them.

So, to make things easier Ms.Matchsticks took a pen and paper and listed down all the qualities that make her a Bossypant.


  • Emotionally unavailable for bullshit
  • Unafraid of her mental vices such as anxiety and depression
  • Says 'No' a lot more than normal girls 
  • Will not devalue herself 
  • Not penis ego stroker
  • Financially independent 
  • Not a baby incubator 
Hah! 

So, why is the world so sacred of women who think? Are they scared of a bored intelligent woman? Does a complex soul scare the shit out of the penis holders who were smothered to believe women are coy? 

Or, are bossypants really that 'bitchy'? 

For now, Ms.Matchsticks wants her coffee just the way she had ordered it. Any thing less, she is going to be in a bad mood all day.

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